Have you ever felt that you can give great advices to people but you can never work out your own problems?

A friend of mine was having some marital problems with her husband, a little similar as mine, she asked for my help and I advised her what to do. That was 2 weeks ago, today she wrote to me how much I helped her, and that I am a good friend and her husband is trying to change a lot for her...





I am very happy for her. Good for her.





But how did I give an advice to someone, and I can't advise myself about what to do?





does anyone feel the same?





Thanks all.Have you ever felt that you can give great advices to people but you can never work out your own problems?
well i do feel the same,just because we have the same problem does not mean we feel the same way about the probelm.


that's why the advise could be more usefull for somebody else.


in other sense 1st we have different people involved.they think,feel differently there for the result as well different. Have you ever felt that you can give great advices to people but you can never work out your own problems?
I don't really feel the same way, but I know a lot of people who do. Ironically marriage counselors have the highest divorce rate, and psychologists have a particularly high suicide rate. It's ironic that those that help others with their problems often don't pay any attention to their own issues or have the ability to fix their problems. I'm a couples counselor, by the way, but I'm happy to report my life is a-okay. Great marriage, no suicide risk here, lol.
When you give advice to others you are somewhat emotionally removed from the situation and can look objectively. When you are knee deep in the situation you can't see the forest through the trees.
Our problems are unique...and you may know exactly what to do...may even have done it...but it does take two to resolve any marital issues and some men are more willing and able to adapt and change than others....keep thinking...keep helping others..and hang in there
That is because we can think more objectively about someone else's problems and when it comes to our own, our feelings get thrown into the mix.
I feel that way all the time. It's because your not on the outside looking in, therefor you can't be as logical.
Just be grateful/thankful that you've helped! Its better than knowing the answer to everything.
sometimes it happened same to you... sometimes we can advise others because we experience it.
Every single day...
Maybe you know what to do but don't want to.
I hear ya... I'm the same way.
Yeah, and if you can read between the lines on this answer you can see how hard I try, but when it gets too close and personal my perspective goes blank. That is what happens to advice on yourself. It gets too distorted and I have a harder time trying to figure things out. Your objectivity gets clouded and the image is like you get too close with a camera the picture does not get as clear where you want the lines on the object to be razor sharp. The answer is harder to define. Yes I do agree with your question, but how great my advice might be or if it's good, I only feel that way if the asker realizes the course to follow really helped in the long run. That they took the time to ask, I took the time to reflect and respond. Win Win all the way around. I will seek advice too, when my perspective is like that camera......
Yes! Definitely,I can really help give ppl advice about their situation almost any,Yet I keep mine with out ever being resolved.I am married for almost 12 yrs with 2 kids and feel Unhappy in my marriage,hubby and I argue alot and never resolved our problems,We then most of the time drop it and be ok again by him gossiping about other ppls problems,He like runs from ours.You seem like a good listener like I am.I rather hear ppls problems than say mine, but there comes a time that we, our minds can't take it anymore and start telling other ppl about out problems or situation like me now.I am Deppressive person and ppl would never ever guess that I am because they see me normal laughing but inside me it's different.I think I can be strong for others but crumbling down.I love helping ppl and kids by listening to them. I feel like a Councelor and ppl like talking to me alot.I wish I can become a Real Councelor or a child Physicatrist or a Teacher.I now have to deal with my own situations and actually have an appointment to a councelor/physicatrist this week,it's my turn to be counceled bc I Really needed.I have gone to counceling few yrs back and felt strange and thought I didn't need it and stopped it and now Realized I do need it.It is great to help ppl out but we need to listen to our selves and help our selves. :). Bye!